…An aspiring socialite sat between a rabbi and a pastor at a fund-raising dinner. Proud of sitting between two clerics she gushed, “I feel like the page between the Old Testament and The New Testament.”
“That page,” said one of the clerics, “is always blank.”
…Two teenage boys were arguing about their dad’s greatness. The first asserted, “My dad is greater than yours”. “No, he is not” the second retorted.
“Ever heard of the Alps? My dad climbed them.”
“That’s nothing. Ever heard of the Dead Sea? My dad killed it.”.
…A Christian family had just read part of Matthew 5 where believers are described as salt of the earth. Tucking their six year old son to bed, his parents retired to watch TV in the living room. The boy had rushed out of his bed with a confused expression. He solemnly asked them, “If we are the salt of the earth, who is the pepper?”.
…Love is Scary! You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, now I’m scared..
…Exercise? I thought you said extra fries..
…Controlling Pastor’s Prayer: Lord, send your glory, send your power. But keep it to half an hour.
…Finally, “As long as you are green, you keep on growing. As long as you are ripe, you start to rot”..
